A Special Celebration of Sorts

A Special Celebration of Sorts
While the completion of my degree is not 100% official (according to the Monterey Institute), there is nonetheless, reason to celebrate. Mid-August was a special feat as I turned in some last remaining assignments and my graduate portfolio. No small task! It was a huge weight off my shoulders. Not that I didn’t enjoy completing my assignments and doing research for school here but, at times, it was very demanding and hectic. I now have more time and freedom to concentrate on reading Thai, perfecting conversation, researching other topic areas, reviewing project designs and grant proposals for other Volunteers, and focusing on specific projects at site. My graduate studies actually paved the way for me to become more proficient in the aforementioned activities so, you see, it’s all connected.

When I first got to site and people didn’t really know what I was doing here or what to do with me, my counterparts would often introduce me by saying: “This is Heidi, she’s a volunteer from America, she’s getting her Master’s Degree...” I guess that makes more sense then trying to explain the evasive and sometimes complicating details of community-based organizational development. Now that I’ve completed my studies and eagerly await a diploma, people are all about the celebration. My neighbors have been planning something for months. When I say planning, I mean we’ve basically just been talking about eating Thai BBQ and singing karaoke.

My fellow Volunteers, also well aware of my ongoing studies, have periodically checked in with me to see how things are going. I am lucky to have 4 fellow Volunteers living in the same province as me—even more lucky to be only 15km away from the nearest Volunteer. We’ll call her Mrs. S. Mrs. S and I have grown very close in the months since I’ve been at site and I find our ongoing communication to be quite refreshing—especially since we are so close, know many of the same people, and can talk about local issues together. Not to mention, she is a college professor with a PhD and has served as a great mentor through my studies and academic development. I’ve been to visit Mrs. S a couple times and during those times, I’ve had the pleasure to meet and get to know her host family. Some Volunteers choose to live with host families and some live alone—I chose the latter. Her host family is what she calls a modern aristocratic family of teachers, artists, and working professionals. They have a beautiful home with perfectly manicured landscaping and breathtaking displays of artwork speckled about their property. A bit out of place out here considering the conditions under which the majority of the population live in. Her family is the epitome of Thai hospitality and extreme “Naam Jai”. Naam jai translates as “water heart” and I would describe it as having a flowing, open, magnanimous, and self-less heart. Every time I see her family, they are extremely generous and kind. They’re also a fun and spirited bunch. In any event, as we’ve grown close, they too, have been keeping up with the status of my studies. When I told Mrs. S that I would be finished with all my work mid-August, she suggested we celebrate together with the family at her place. It also happened to fall during a time when she had cause for celebration—the induction of her new prayer alter which had followed a lengthy construction process. Mrs. S planned to use the lovely wood alter for daily chants and Buddhist study. She’s Buddhist too, only a different order than what Thais traditionally practice.

When the family caught wind of all the cause for celebration, they went all out. I could not have envisioned such a festivity. It exceeded my wildest expectation and I was completely taken aback and overwhelmed by the magnitude of preparation and thoughtfulness the put in to our joint celebration. Somewhere between the PHA Occupational Training and Wan San Dton Dta, we gathered for this grand event. We were lucky to have 4 other Volunteers attend the event at Mrs. S’s house. Together with the family and other Thai friends, we joined for an enormous degree of feasting, reminiscing, laughing, singing and dancing. But, the absolute best part and most special, was an re-enactment of what my graduation ceremony would be like. That’s right. They created a completely original and outstanding commencement ceremony. While distracting me in another room, I was instructed to put on a homemade graduation gown and wait. When I emerged, the living area of the house had been arranged set with a podium, backdrop, and flowers. Family members stood in two single-filed lines, posing as aisles for me to walk between. And there, at the podium, stood Mrs. S and another Volunteer (we’ll call him Mr. J) fully clothed in the professor’s commencement robes. Off to the side, was another of my friends posing as a reporter from CNN—even using a real microphone. My other friend stood in the audience, barely containing her excitement and laughs. There, I walked down the aisles of onlookers and approached the podium. Mrs.S and Mr. J, greeted me and proceed to give small speeches after which they presented me with a ‘diploma’. Being a one-man-show-graduation, I gave the expected Magna Cum Lauda speech, and tossed my so-called graduation cap into the audience. Then, of course, my friend posing as the reporter came to interview.

The production was a complete shock but so utterly amazing! I had no idea they were planning all that. It wasn’t long before the ceremony broke into karaoke (English songs!), dancing, and tons of photo-ops. I can only hope it was as much fun for everyone who attended as it was for me. The party proceeded with a Volunteer ‘adult-sleepover’ at Mrs. S’s and a terrific morning brunch. No doubt, the whole experience will forever be etched in my mind whenever I think of Thailand, whenever I think of my studies. I only hope that in the months to come, in the next year and ½ I will be able to convey how greatly I appreciate the family’s naam jai and reciprocate back.

3:30 AM: Wan San Dton Dta and the Temple is Packed!

A Khmer-Thai Tradition

For the past 4 days I’ve been utterly engrossed in Wan San Dton Dta. It’s the Khmer holiday I touched a bit on in an earlier entry. This festival is bigger than New Years, Christmas, and your birthday combined. It loosely translates from Khmer as “a day of reverence”. I don’t know if words can do it justice. It’s a very special local tradition for only those people with Khmer heritage. It happens in the 3 provinces of Thailand closest to Cambodia and only within select communities. The only thing I can really equate it to is Day of the Dead in Mexico. The whole point is to honor your ancestors and the spirit world. The climax is the one day out of the year in which you’re ancestors are believed to come back to Earth and dine/ drink in celebration and give blessings to living relatives. In every household, office, and building, people arrange these huge shrines of mattresses decorated with food, beverages, bedding, candles, incense, etc. In each household, the family gathers to hold a special prayer and ask for blessings together. Each person places 7 pieces of sticky rice on the shrine. The significance of 7 is—as I understand it—the seven levels of life and forms of living (whether it be as a spirit or rebirth in to an inanimate object, insect, animal, etc.) Ensuing is a decent amount of drinking, dancing, and singing. If you’re going to have a party and celebrate the lives of the deceased, you must go all out. And they do.
At the beginning of San Dton Dta, there was a huge parade and festival in the District town in which 22 sub-districts participated. I was elected to lead our float all decked out in Thai/Khmer costume—headdress and all. Quite the sight. I think I smiled for 3 hours straight! Including that day, I’ve been getting up absurdly early to partake in the festivities at around 3:30 AM. Today (Saturday), is the last day and by the end of today alone, I will have gone to the temple 4 times. Intense! One of the things I find most interesting about the Dton Dta observance is it’s interconnectedness to Buddhism. A little history: In the Thirteenth Century, the last great Khmer emperor practiced Buddhism and constructed some of the most beautiful and significant Buddhist temples in present-day Thailand and Cambodia. The emperors before had practiced a mix of Animist, Hindu, and Brahman beliefs. SEE ALSO: Khmer Empire http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Khmer_empire
Present-day ethnic Khmers practice varying degrees of all these beliefs. Obviously, the temple is Buddhist and when we went, the monks did the same Sanskrit chants they do at any regular gathering. It was primarily the same as observing a Buddhist holiday but, if this makes sense, the monks were chanting for different, more inclusive reasons—those tied to Khmer animist and Brahman beliefs and customs. In the Buddhist waning moon ceremony that I attended before, people walked around the temple three time, holding candles. As part of the Khmer ceremony, people walked around the temple for a 5-minute period lifting their platters of spirit offerings to the sky while (quite literally) hooting and yelping, as if to summon up the spirit world. Then, when the morning ceremony was over and we were walking away from the temple, people were throwing random foodstuff at the meen’s (Buddhist gravestones). My neighbor explained that this was to offer food to those spirits that may have arisen from the graves inside the temple grounds during the summons ritual. Fascinating.
I don’t think my description can really do this experience justice, which is why I took some videos. This whole whirlwind experience had been incredibly intriguing and fun. I feel special in a way to be so intimately tied to the cultural activities, invited to go places that foreigners don’t normally go, and experience so many unique, sacred things. It’s an Anthropological mecca! That was one of my Undergraduate Degrees.

A Heavy Topic

Since the Youth Conference, a steady stream of events has kept life sufficiently busy. It has been a much more conducive tempo for me since I tend to function better being busy than not. In effect, there’s a lot to write about! Let’s rewind about a week...
On September 9, 2009, I departed from site with four women to one of the Eastern-most provinces bordering Laos called Mukdahan. The purpose of our trip was to attend a PHA occupational training. PHA = Person’s Having HIV/AIDS. It was a very vital and productive experience for myself and the women who came along. Two of these women were PHA’s and two, Health Volunteers. The act of traveling alone gave the women the opportunity to travel on their own and get a taste of self-reliance as we figured out bus tickets and schedules. Seemingly a simple task but nonetheless empowering in it’s own way—particularly since some of them had never traveled on their own before. The training allowed me to spend time with community members outside of our usual environment in a learning and intimate setting. This was particularly significant since I had not yet had a chance to build relationships with PHA’s one-on-one. Three of these women had never been out of Sisaket Province before so this was a monumental trip for them. It was particularly exciting because the training was held in a very calming location near the Mekong River. All the ladies got to see Laos for the first time ever. At the training, we meet other PHA’s, learned some practical skills (like making soaps/shampoos, an herbal compress, and basics about Thai massage), and most importantly, we discussed health issues such as how to keep healthy and overcome the societal stigma of having HIV/AIDS. Towards the end, we discussed viable projects and activities PHA’s could do in our community. I learned that most people in my community have little or no education on the facts about HIV/AIDS, safe sex, sexually transmitted diseases, and family planning. This was a sobering yet important realization. It became apparent during a session with a nurse about sexually transmitted diseases as I noted my ladies were asking the bulk of questions and fervently writing notes. Following, the five of us had a serious discussion about these issues and how villagers had little exposure to information. Even the PHA’s were not aware about all the facts surrounding HIV/AIDS—ironically in the middle of our discussion, one of them got a call from her husband (who is also a PHA) who told her about a recent tattoo he got. What?! Red flag. I almost had a heart attack! It was even more alarming that the women didn’t seem to acknowledge or understand how dangerous getting a tattoo was for a PHA.
In retrospect, the PHA’s were able to ask questions and engage in discussion at such a magnitude they had never been exposed to before. This helped them feel more assured and comfortable with themselves and about their own place in the community. The atmosphere definitely lent itself the space for each person to be themselves and let go of apprehensions.
By the end of the training, we were able to come up with a few project plans that we could do in our community. Together we decided a good start would be having a simply get-together with PHA’s in the sub-district to have an open discussion and get to know each other better over lunch. We realized, every PHA in our area (there are 10) might not be comfortable even doing this since there is no current PHA group/support system of the sort in our sub-district and some people prefer to have full anonymity. Another crucial area we decided to implore was becoming more active in teaching villagers and young adults important health and family planning issues. With Health Volunteers and PHA’s willing to participate, we plan to visit each village and give simple mini-workshop in order to disseminate information to adults and teenagers. In addition, we would like to pursue more occupational trainings in our area modeled after the training we received in Mukdahan. The ladies had many great ideas and seemed to be only very impressed with the whole experience. They were able to gain a new level of confidence and commitment to serve in their community. Personally, I was very thankful to have the opportunity to go and bring these ladies with me. We discovered many things about ourselves and the potential for making important differences in our community. Not only that, but it was also a lot of fun! At the end we had a nice celebration to acknowledge our achievements and sing a little karaoke—it wouldn’t be Thailand without karaoke.
I must pause here for a moment to fully divulge into the realities of HIV/AIDS and PHA’s in Thailand...
Before I came to Peace Corps, I really knew nothing about so many of the miniscule components of Thai society. HIV/AIDS being one of them. During Pre-Service Training 1, we went to an HIV/AIDS hospice center at a Buddhist temple. This is one of a kind center in Thailand as there are very little physical centers for HIV/AIDS patients to seek refuge and support from. The center operates with donations and some aid money. The center also is special in that it uses Buddhist principles to help people deal with their illness. It was a very overpowering experience. At the center, there was a museum of mummified AIDS patients and also preserved body parts. Coupled with the mummified bodies were the victim’s names, occupations, where they were from, how they contracted AIDS and when they died. Those who died donated their bodies to not only to science in this aspect but also to teach people about the disease in a humanistic manner. In another annex, there was a building that had piles of cloth representative of every single patient that had died at the temple that never had a family member or friend come to recover their remains. While at the temple, we met and talked to patients—something I had never really done before—other than maybe once middle school. Then, some of the patients put on a performance and we had Q & A. They told us about their lives having lived with this disease, their likes/dislikes, talents, passions, and families. It was an extremely eye-opening and emotional learning experience.
HIV/AIDS in Thailand has the highest prevalence in Asia with about 750,000 known to be positive. It was decreasing due to a large campaign for prevention but has risen more in recent year. This may or may not be due to a significance slow down of awareness and governmental support programs in the past few years. There’s also been less international aid coming in to tackle HIV/AIDS specifically—think PEPFAR.
Given what I’ve learned and what I can observe, I think the worst part of having HIV/AIDS in Thailand must be the societal stigma attached to it. Many people only associate it with prostitution and promiscuity. Therefore, it may be commonplace to understand a person with HIV/AIDS as being a harlot or a hooker or sexually irresponsible in some aspect. Which, in reality a good portion of the virus is passed from mother to child or husbands who solicit sex workers and give it to their wives. I’ve come across research suggesting that for every man with HIV/AIDS in Thailand, he will infect on average 2 women. Men either will not or do not get tested as often as women get tested. Women probably get checked more due to obvious family planning and reproductive health reasons. Therefore, when say, a married woman does get tested—no matter if she contracted it from her husband or not—she will most likely be the one to blame for having it and be ostracized and scrutinized more by the community. Like I said, I’m talking from the research that I’ve done and what I’ve observed so please don’t take my word as the final end-all. Bottom line, there is a huge societal stigma attached to HIV/AIDS. People who have it are scared they will either be disowned by their family & friends or they will overly burden them by making their loved ones feel obligated to take care of them.
Even my host family in Lop Buri, when I told them I was going to the hospice center, told me not to touch or get close or even talk to any of the patients there. It was very sad. The whole experience really taught me that it's not fair to ostracize people just because they're sick. We shouldn’t make judgments on someone’s past either because in situations like this, it’s impossible to know. They are still human beings and deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. They can still be a valuable part of society. It really made me want to do awareness campaigns and get involved with HIV/AIDS awareness at site. Also made me realize, there is a lot to be done in changing the perspective and misnomers Thai people have about HIV/AIDS. It's a terrible virus/disease and yes, it is contagious given certain circumstances. But, if you know the facts and your conscious of them, then what is there to be scared about when working and living with PHA’s?
Should we treat people with HIV/AIDS any differently than we treat our best friends and family? Should we separate them and oust them and understand them as invalids? Absolutely not. We can eat together, work together, play together, laugh together, cry together, talk together. Experience life together. There’s room in the world for everyone to coexist; compassionately, peacefully, and respectfully. To me, part of being human is acknowledging other human beings as you acknowledge yourself. And if you see yourself as someone with many qualities, indefinable, incandescent, and worthy then there’s no reason why other’s—no matter their circumstance—cannot be seen as this. Sometimes, I have to remind myself of the bigger picture, that what it means to be human and move around the earth (the auspiciousness of it all) is a much greater condition than being labeled a certain way by society or being confined to a certain condition.

Ya Wa Chon is Thai for Youth

These past few days delivered a long awaited, necessary change of pace. From Wednesday to Sunday, I ventured out of site with two teenage girls (ages 15 and 17) and 1 adult counterpart to a South Central province for the annual Peace Corps/Thailand Youth Development Conference. The Youth Development Conference is a Peace Corps sponsored event, which admits 15 Volunteers with 2 youth and 1 Thai counterpart each—totaling 45 participants. The focus included confidence development, planning for the future, relationship and team building. There were tons of fun games and opportunities to work together. It was a very well executed and refreshing event for Volunteers, youth, and counterparts to attend. Especially thanks to the hard work and dedication of the Peace Corps/Thailand Youth Global Initiative Group and Admin Staff who had literally been planning this event for a year. It also gave me a great outlet to be able to spend time and work with some kids in my community. Truth be told, it couldn’t have come a moment too soon. I was itching to get away. I hadn’t been doing much of anything since I finished my graduate studies in late August (hooray) and election excitement seemed to be intensifying by the hour. Being away from the 3-6 allowed me to forgo the climax of the local elections—election day. I did however get a whiff of the aftermath.

At the Conference...

Thai kids and teenagers are very different than their American counterparts. This became glaringly obvious at the conference. The Youth at the conference were amazingly behaved, attentive, insightful, and friendly. Not that American teens can’t be these things but this was to an extreme magnitude. The way that they came together and worked as an intimate group in such a short amount of time was truly a sight to see. It was quite an experience to witness the flying of words, thoughts, ideas, feelings, and expressions amongst the kids. All of us agreed that these kids were more apt and mature in personal development and assurance than we were at their age. To even get us in a room among other kids from different schools and ages to work and play together at such a level would have been unheard of. The other Volunteers and I recollected unruly teenage years. We all remember going through very elusive and tough phases as teenagers being faced with figuring out our own identities, true friendships, personal goals. I personally recall very tumultuous times of trying to figure out how my beliefs/goals in life fit into the social fabric of family and society. Not to mention how I got to where I was and figure out where I was going. Lots of question and not enough answers.

Individuality vs. Collectivity

I had a friend recently point out a significant difference between the average American teenager and the average Thai teenager. He noted that Thais have more of a sense of self and identity—not in a personal way but collectively. That is to say from a very young age the collective society has been reinforcing their identity and how it functions as part of the group. Therefore, when they reach the stage of adolescence, they already have a sense of self and they aren’t left to seek for it on their own (as in the way an American teenager might experience confusion and identity crisis). Inherently, American culture is more individually focused than Thai culture. It’s all about understanding your personal beliefs, life goals, priorities, tastes, abilities, routines, likes, dislikes, capabilities, etc. Thai culture is more oriented toward how an individual can and should contribute to the collective—whether that collective consist of immediate family, the village, the classroom, or group of friends. Of course, both have varying degrees of collective and individual qualities. American’s can have collective qualities and Thais can have individual qualities. In the rural community where I live, society definitely sways toward collectivity. People do everything together and there in no real sense of personal space. People move in and out of space freely and share many of their possessions with one another. Often times, children will live with their parents until they marry and on into the early years of marriage. Yes, this includes adult children even in their 30’s and 40’s.

When I explained to my neighbors and co-workers that I hadn’t really lived with my family or parents since I was 18, they were a bit bewildered. There were so many questions and concerns. First, it was...why (on earth) would you live away from home starting at the tender age of 18?! Where did you live? How did you get by on your own? Who cooked for you and did your laundry? Who took care of you when you were sick? Weren’t you lonely?! It ended up being a good opportunity to give my Thai friends some good insight into American culture and lifestyle. I explained it’s common for children to move out of their parent’s house once they graduate high school. At a certain point in life, something in our society dictates that it’s time to be on your own. So, we go to college, move away, get jobs, travel, date. In one way or another we test the waters. In a certain manner, I’ve come to realize that loneliness for an American may be naturally different than loneliness for a Thai—or for my villagers anyways. If I’m around people I can befriend, connect with at some level, co-exist with, and communicate with for a given amount of time in one day then I don’t have a need to feel lonely. Sometimes, I need less than that. I could probably go days without seeing a person and not feel lonely. But, I’ve learned for many people in my community, even leaving the area for 1 or 2 days by themselves is difficult because they feel uneasy and alienated outside the village/kinship network that is in constant motion. It’s a comfortable mechanism of survival. Given this mentality, they were very amazed to hear about my lack of loneliness here. Although, they get it. They understand that I come from somewhere else and think differently. Which, really helps them make more sense of that I enjoyed living in a house by myself and having some alone time. Now, if I could only convince them that I also come from a place where we can eat a meal and feel satisfied without eating 3 piping hot bowls of white rice a day!

In Thai culture, things are not cut and dry. While it is true that some people do leave to go to college, they still return to be a part of the household and when they are done, many move back permanently to live and start families. It’s not surprising, then, that virtually everyone in my village (made up of about 1000 people) are in some way related. Even more phenomenal, is the fact that these lines of kinship have remained in the area for probably hundreds of years. The villagers here are literally living on their ancestors land. Pretty cool in it’s own way. They have a strong sense of identity, community, and heritage. Something, I think, I can learn a great deal as I get to know the people better. Once, I was talking to a teenage girl and I was telling her that the system of community here is very different than in America. For instance, I already know my neighbors here and the insides of their houses better than I do the neighbors I had for 10 years in America. They also know me better. She said to me that she believes that Thailand may be behind in economical development that Westerners have already mastered but the development of compassion and community in Thailand is something people here have achieved at a greater magnitude than the West. I’ll be chewing on that for a while.